Disclaimer: this rant is written for a specific group of people. If you don’t belong to it, you already know that you don’t, congratulations, great shall be your reward in the afterlife.
DEAR [PEOPLE WHO DEBATE ABOUT SHERLOCK HOLMES’ SEXUALITY],
Right okay so! I was going to let this go. I really was! I am not feeling well today, and I saw this, and I was irritated as all fuck, and I thought to myself “No, no, do not. Do not! It is not worth it.” And then I found this, in which the author of this post responds to a “Why can’t you just let people have fun,” criticism with the following: “My family had to flee our native home of Disneyland during the Fun Pogrom of the 1990s. Our Jumpy House burned to the ground and I’ve avoided fun every since.”
As it turns out, pogrom jokes? Yeah, they’re my breaking point. Who knew, right? So…
Dear Asshole:
Here are some things I’m not going to do. I’m not going to talk about the queering of literature, and why what you’ve said in this post shits all over the rights and realities and histories of an entire population; my dear friend Postcard has done that better than I ever could right here. I’m not going to go through your entire post point by point and illustrate each and every way in which things you’ve stated as “incontrovertible fact” are, in fact, anything but (and I’m putting that in quotation marks, by the way, to illustrate my careful reading, since you’re so quick to point out, in your replies post, that “This is why reading frequently is important, btw, so you catch things like this”). I don’t have all day, after all. I’m certainly not going to get into an argument with you about the various and assorted reasons I choose to read the text as queer, because, quite frankly, I don’t need to justify myself to you, and neither does anyone else.
What I am going to do is talk about your tone. The sidebar of your tumblr advises me that you “do teaching,” so consider this some constructive criticism of your presentation method, hmm? Because between you and me, buddy, I’ll tell you what: you could use some work.
I don’t really need to add anything to gyzym and postcard’s arguments, because they are perfect. But I will say that I could English-major-close-read the shit out of the first paragraph he quotes and “prove” the exact opposite point. LITERATURE IS SUBJECTIVE AND FULL OF THIS THING CALLED SUBTEXT ESPECIALLY WITH A CHARACTER NARRATOR WHO BY THE VERY NATURE OF THE NARRATION IS UNREALIABLE.
Done.
don’t really react to posts like this, but I love the above comment...one or two things to...
I wasn’t going...two cents, but then...suddenly...
most amazing person.
I’m sorry, but when did...become fucking dictator
matters/I don’t...bigotry against women...make sixty billion...
fucking hero! Everything...said, just brilliant, absolutely brilliant!
postcard’s arguments, because...could English-major-close-read